Monday, April 30, 2012

这就是我的压力

这几天才真正意识到我承受的压力已经不是我能撑得住的。前天我胃痛得很不寻常,因为我昨天又一场考试,我试了两种药,竟然一点效果也没有。我是花了很长的时间来告诉自己,不要给自己太大的压力,是不是压力作祟了?就在我成功舒缓自己压力的同时,我的胃顿时不疼了。天啊?我到底要承受这种压力到什么时候啊?就因为我很害怕我不及格,我很害怕失望,我很害怕我的事情做不完,所以无形之中给了自己那么大不可及的压力。我很感谢有人能理解我,懂我,为我加油,没有一句埋怨。

回到工作上,我的工作堆积如山,有些事是能叫他做的,但是我没有。为什么?我只希望他能好好的去走他的sales。Sales is not only generated for our boss, is so for our future. When does he going to understand this? 很多话我讲也讲过了,劝也劝过了,鼓励也鼓励过了,什么时候才有用?或许是我的方式不符合你了,please, I am only hope to have his understanding. 如果他不是要好好的去做,那我那么辛苦承担那么多工作干嘛?我那么累,那么努力的读书,认真的工作,不是只想换来一句,‘瑷芬,你很厉害耶!’我只希望告诉他,我能在不需要他操心的情况下,按按纷纷地做我的工作,这样他才能专心的去执行他该完成的工作!时间不短了,我们耗了很长的时间了,一天又一天,一个月有一个月,半年又来了。我不希望半年后还是原地踏步!!

最近我真的很累,每次只要静下来几秒钟,我的脑里想的就是他的事。我不懂我能做什么,就是不懂我能做什么,我才那么不知所措。我很慌,真的,我慌我们没有方向。两个月前,如果说我太急,我还能接受,我该忍耐;两个月后的今天,说我太急?我只能说:我能不急吗?为什么我不能急?

I don't think the pressure would disappear itself, if we don't slow it down ourselves. I'm trying to keep the pressure down by confidently doing all the thing with paying the maximum effort which purposely hope to get a adequate outcome. No one is perfect, but the one who are lazy and easily give up would never get respected by the others, and no one would help in the one who never think to do the things diligently.  

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Confuse~~

Damn tired this few days, last week went for cleaning my grandparent's the tombstone. Good news again, I'm happy that my cousin sis and bro are getting married soon. Congrats to them, and I'm preparing to have a pretty wear at the night soon. This time should success on my diet, and slim myself. 

Other than that, these few days, I keep thinking to change my job just hope to have a better environment at least would give me a better future. I only realized that if staying here longer my position would just stuck here and I know this boss would never value me. Some-more, current income is totally can't satisfy and not able to cover my spending. I don't know when to be changed but I try, and I should make it. For those are understanding and supporting me, thank you so much and sure I won't disappoint you all as well as myself.
Just some time that I need, setting up all those things are needed. 

Now what I hope? Should be a lot, I hope -- I have a healthy body, I pass my coming ACCA examined paper, all the tasks on my hand can be completed, and --- I can keep my happy mood always at least not to get upset (this's what doctor tell me) to care of body always. 





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